SEVENTYSEVEN. shaggedd ):

reached home about 8+. ttly no strength already i tell you ): even typing also super tired to type out. so now i'm typing super slowly D:

suddenly feel so...

SEVENTYSIX.

there's one thing about change that remains constant.
.......................................it is ALWAYS painful.
...................................................................................- Jodi Picoult, The Tenth Circle

SEVENTYFIVE. flashbacks (:

24sep08
jasker's bday. went to school, met xy and wished her happy bday. she jitao rolled her eyes and said "thanks" very coldly -__- bitch can! roar. super angry with her D:

after school went to coffee bean with xy and cindy to study :D met lonez and AO there too! cindy left about 3 for tuition. okay, first i must say that xy's crazy (who doesn't know that -__- haha!) she crapped alot with lonez and AO and i'm just sitting there either laughing with/at them or ignoring them LOL! =X seriously man! they're super lame. then suddenly xy was playing with lonez's PAINT MARKERS and drew all of our hands. she wrote "i'm a VIRGIN" om my hand can )): LOL! and i wrote something on hers :D haha. won't say it here lah. wait she kill me =X

went down to Banquet about 7 and watched three of them eat their dinner. ron came and passed me his jacket :D thanks lah. haha :D

after eating went up to McCafe and slacked haha. =X talked about their chalet and yes, once again, they're crazy!!! LOL! oh i got invited too. haha. see how. go there for bbq maybe? but a little dangerous ):

came home and i did ss prelim corrections. super study mood :D hehe.

26sep08
after school stayed in canteen to lunch with xinyan. then walked to jurong green's mac to study :D met jianhao and yiloon there. chatted while studying. saw a bastard there -__-

studied for awhile, then suddenly no mood =X a while more later, walked xinyan to her tuition centre then came home (:

once reached home, found out from xinyan that that bastard has a new gf. ha! how wonderful. this kind of guys, only one thing on their mind and that's SEX. true love has no meaning to them man! :O act like one smoker in front of both of us also. ha! pukes man. he's a total jerk lah. oh WAIT. why do i care so much? LOL w/e. told xinyan that i wanna find one guy who's really handsome and alot better quality and walk in front of him LOL! IN HIS FACE MAN!!!! :D

chatted with cindy on e phone. talked about stuffs. yeah, majority of e male population are purely bastards and jerks. then, where have the minority gone to? can you guys come out? haha!!! k lah. i personalyl know a few of them (: BUTTTT!!! not my type =D oh, except maybe one or two? :O

find a rich guy, and when hua gou le, jiu dump him. LOL! this is what me and xinyan said. retribution to e male population LOL! =X aiyah...no lah. i won't be that bad ((:

i want o's to be over so that i can finally RELAX! roar O_O

27sep08
woke up in the morning not wanting to go prayers =X in e end mum and dad left first and i still have to meet them anyway ): went out about 10 to meet them there. bus-ed to jalan toa payoh and they fetched me there. car-ed to amk's jack place to have lunch! :D ordered grilled fish fillet set lunch. SUPER YUMMY I TELL YOU!!! :D haha! came with chicken soup, coffee and mango juice :D very nice :D after lunch, car-ed home and STUDIED!

28sep08
woke up about 9++, bathed then slacked =X went out about 11+ and bus-ed to jurong green. met ron there and went to his house (: studied there. HEY! I GOT STUDY OK CINDY CHAN! LOL! did 1 qn of ss and finished up my emath P1 and P2 ((((: haha. had pizza for lunch! though not much appetite =X oh, his dog is super uber cute!!!! LOL! i love her. haha =X small size, huge eyes and one brown patch on one eye. super loveable k :D oh oh. i just realised something. i'm super in love with pets nowadays. LOL! :D





i want a cat/dog )):

SEVENTYFOUR. lonely ):

rahh. idk why nowadays i'm feeling so super lonely ): YES, i need a guy LOL! single life don't suit me well ))))): though i have my girls there but still, it's ttly different from a guy lah. roar ): i know it's time to concentrate on my o's now. and i'm not going to find any guy during this period. BUT, i'm still super lonely D: roar!!!!!

SEVENTYTHREE.

went out with chanchaiping today after paper :D haha. went to town but can't find )): lazy to update so i'm just gonna post pics :D [later. photobucket loading v slow )): ]









i love e dress i'm wearing! hahah :D taken at isetan ((:
















idk what's up with this pic. LOL =X


went to e hongkong cafe at bugis :D drank wongkok lover twins. haha :D


omgsssss.. cindychan looks like cxy right?!?!?!?! O_O






taken from a choc store [forgot what's e name =X] yes, those cakes and plants are REAL FOOD LOL!


she's wearing a daniel yam dress :D

SEVENTYTWO.

lalala.

went to boonlay to meet cindy. she was FOUR MINUTES LATE! LOL! i don't mind lah. used to waiting for her liao. hahaha =X bus-ed to school, had bio mcq. quite ok la ((:

ate maggi mee, came back home. i was late for tuition -__- and she didn't put in full one and a half hours lah. she counted the time in which i was late too ):

went to mac cause my sister asked me to go. didn't want to eat at first, end up i was super tempted by my sis and got nuggets meal ))): omg D:

just got back and i'm bored now ): gonna study geog later :D haha.

SEVENTYONE. study? nahh

just got back home. ahh so tired now ):

went to school thr pass hanwei e thumbdrive. he walked me to e busstop. THANK YOU LAHH. YOU'RE A VERY GOOD PERSON :D hahaha!

went to boonlay to meet xinyan. ok, you aren't late. i was 15min early -__- LOL. went to coffee bean and bought cake and coffee :D


my chicago cheesecake!


xinyan's mud pie :D


our cakes!! yummy ((((:




haha. belgian chocolate rocks :D


studied abit of chem then at about 12 xinyan say want to eat. LOL! bought chicken and mushroom fusilli and we shared :D very nice la. but we didn't finish it. very jaded =X after eating, both of us TOTALLY NO STUDY MOOD LOL! so we crapped ard, wanted to go kbox, called cindy and she heard SKATE BOARD LOL! think we laughed really loud? haha =X


I GOT A PIC OF HER! LOL

after that xinyan suddenly say want watch movie. LOL! bought tix to WALL-E :D hahaha. walked ard jp to pass time. went to toilet, and yes, cam-whored a lil' (:

then went up to cinema to wait. then got this old woman thr complaining so loudly about e service. keep saying "shit" and "ridiculous" LOL! me and xinyan were sitting down cursing that woman. hahaha =X!

e show was VERY NICE :D haha. yes, i LOVE walt disney and pixar animations :D woo! hahaha. ohhhh!!!! and HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 IS COMING OUT! WOO! I'M SOOOO EXCITED! HAHAHA :D

after e show, met my mum, shopped at ntuc then came back. ttly no energy now ): siannnnnn. AND I'M OFFICIALLY BROKE. DAMN IT!

SEVENTY. exhausted.

OMGS!!!!! last night slept at about 1 and i woke up at 7+ -__- WTH!!! LOL! super tired lah.

anyway later going to school to meet hanwei first. pass him thumbdrive with hs dnt stuffs la. eh i'm so good can :D LOL from taman jurong to jurong west just to pass him his dnt stuffs :D lalala.

after that gonna meet xinyan :D COFFEE BEAN COFFEE BEAN COFFEE BEAN! LOL! ehh, i'm so hooked on coffee bean and idk why -__-

oh well, will post later in e night. maybe with some piccys. gonna bring my cam along :D bye!

SIXTYNINE. tired ):

sooo tired now. realised sth. it's been so long since stayed up this late. LOL!

helped hanwei with his dnt folio. I'M GOOD OK LOL! crapped around with xinyan. and now i'm shagged ): ahhh. tmr alarm clock NINE AM LOL!

ahh, tired LOL gonna sleep soon! as soon as hanwei opens up his hotmail :D

SIXTYEIGHT. 中秋节快乐!

hello!

just got back from e dining room with my stomach full of mooncakes and jacob's creek wine :D soooo nice :D hahaha. surprisingly, for e first time, i drank one full cup [p.s. i don't like wine.] e wine was ok la. haha. quite nice :D very shiok :D LOL




my yam mooncake! :D


chocolate brownie walnut [ i think ] didn't try this cause for those who knows, i don't eat nuts :D


snowskin yam mooncake! rocks :D




jacob's creek wine :D

was supposed to wake up at SIXAM today to help mum cook for prayers. END UP i turned off my alarm, wanting to get up but i fell asleep -___- haha. didn't help to cook. went to toa payoh. was super frking HOT there!!!! argh )):

came home, bathed. helped sis put nail polish. LOL!!! keep laughing while putting it on. idk why also. i'm siao today -___-

after that i STUDIED. yes, i studied. not surprising enough? i studied GEOG. yes, G-E-O-G-R-A-P-H-Y :D yeayea, i know. i'm super shocked at myself too. did full chap on coast and half chap on development. LOL! i'm proud :D

while doing geog, was on my bed. then suddenly had e urge to do situps. LOL! i told you i was crazy today -__- did FIFTY!! FOR E FIRST TIME!! AT ONE SHOT! I LOVE MYSELF MAN LOL!!!!! ehh, if only everyday can do this. LOL! but then, funny i don't feel e strain on my stomach muscles O_O is there something wrong with me? LOL aiseh, don't wait tmr kana strain LOL =X choyyyyyy ))):

talking about tmr, GOING TO MY BELOVED COFFEE BEAN FOR STUDIES WITH YAN! :D hahaha. yay! LOL i can finally go out :D with pure 100% permission from BOTH my parents :D rocks right? :D

it's a good day today :D



ok, this is the sky i saw ytd. it's so nice isn't it? gives you sort of a calming, soothing effect :D creds to my beautiful photography skills of couse :D LOL

SIXTYSEVEN. fed-up

ARGH!! i seriously hate my life right now. really. it's so damn unfair. thought last night could have went out end up my dad stayed home. GOT ME EXCITED FOR NOTHING! GOT ME EXCITED FOR SHIT! damn it lah. i want to go out STUDY also cannot. not as if i go out shopping or what right?!?!?!?!? it's STUDY leh! fuck lahhhhh ))))):

i'm gonna rebel. seriously. i'll do things which i'm not supposed to do. and i won't be sorry at all.

SIXTYSIX. )):

hello, i'm here blogging again :D LOL! was supposed to go COFFEE BEAN to study with xinyan and cindy, BUT! my mum don't let [argh $%^#!%$^#%$!]

11sep
PHY/CHEM PRACTICAL PRELIMINARY EXAMINATION! ok, i'm mad. was quite easy :D I THINK I CAN PASS WITH FLYING COLOURS! think nia :D hahaha. after e prac was quarantined in ava room. lame please. chatted with xinyan and cindy for TWO HOURS. YES, TWO FREAKING HOURS!!! i think that's e longest chat we've had -___- LOL! it's fun though :D hahaha.

after that we went to js's mac to eat :D sarah came along too. haha. was so damn full ): [i'm putting on alot of weight now. roar! i'm gonna go on diet from now onwards. NOPE! this is not a lie ((: i believe i have more self determination than xinyan LOL! ]

went to xinyan's hse, changed then went off to COFFEE BEAN! hahaha. [yes, another place where i put on weight =X ] we studied ok!!!! hahaha. go to xinyan's blog for proof :D bought THE ULTIMATE ice blended and PRALINE CHEESECAKE. soooo nice!!!!!! hahaha. heavenly i tell you :D



today
yay! going to park tonight with my girls :D gonna play like one kind. hahaha! SPARKLERS AND LANTERNS! LOL!

SIXTYFIVE. randoms

hahaha. changed blogskin again :D LOL realised that whenever i have nothing to do i'll just change it :P it's fun and ADDICTIVE :D hahaha.

just saw bags from taiwan :D I WANNA BUY!!! hahaha. but want to know e shipment fee first ba. then i decide again. it's super cheap i tell you. S$16 only. cheap or what?!?!?! wahaha :D then saw some shirts. planning to buy :D haha. i'm gonna go broke man -___-

oh, dec gonna work. maybe. haha. need to wait for confirmation. gonna do own business with mum and aunt at anchorpoint. asked for a table space there and now waiting for confirmation :D hahaha. EXCITED!! gonna get monehh :D LOL

i wanna go korea this hols :D haha. hope schedules can fit. no wait, HOPE STILL GOT TOURS LEFT!!! now already gonna end year liao )): omgsssss hope have sia D: next sat gonna go travel agency :D

i wanna go PLAY FIRE with scbs!!! roar!!! )))): sat night confirm cannot de leh D: now waiting for sarah to confirm. hahaha :D friday night :D lalala. i wanna relax and have fun with my girls :D hehehe

next friday maybe going out with chanchaiping to SHOP!! hahaha. k la, i'm not shopping. i don't think so =X LOL! gonna find her prom stuffs :D yay!!! i can shop for her also. LOL :D i'll be her fashion designer, makeup artist, etc. YEAH, if you don't mind, THIS IS MY PROMISE TO YOU CINDYCHANCHAIPING LOL!!!!!

SIXTYFOUR. thoughts

i hate who i've become.


really, i hate my character, i hate my life, i hate my personality, i hate it whenever someone mentions some words and i go all sensitive, i hate my feelings, i hate me. yes, it's that simple. i just hate me.

SIXTYTHREE. roar ):

haha. just played audi -__- okok, i'm supposed to be studying for EMATH tmr but... OOPS! )): oh well. should i burn midnight oil tonight? hmm NAHH! hahaha. i can't do that la. i'm too lazy =X!




















badmood

SIXTYTWO. cigarettes :D

wanna intro this song to all :D it's rly nice.


Fort Minor - Cigarettes





lyrics:

Man I love this rap game
Mainly cuz its cool
To add a little spice to the life you've been through
Everyone exaggerates a tiny little bit
To make that shit sound more gangster than it really is
You cant appear weak man
We wanna hear street
Wanna hear you spit your thug over this here beat
Dont take it as sarcasticI can't get enough
I'm telling you
You can call my bluff
If it's not rough, then I really don't need it
I'm not even ashamed
I got too much reality thats filling up my brain
so sell me on that chronic, I'm addicted to the game
Suck it up like a cigarette, light it up

Its just like a cigarette, its something that I do
Once in awhile but between me and you
Its just like a cigarette
Nobody's really fooled
I dont want the truth,
I wanna feel fucking cool

Let me tell you something that I realized tonight
My hip hop radio is like marlboro lights
They're both selling stories and they sound about the same
Cigarettes say their safe, rappers claim they really bang
We dont care if it's true when we lay the money down
We don't believe the words, we just love the way they sound
They're acting like we're idiots,
They're lying to our face
Maybe we are idiots, we buy it anyway

I'm runnin out to get the next rapper's CD
Just suckin up the guns, drugs, and misogyny
The same way that I suck up all the stories
When I breathe that little bit of death supposedly cancer-free and
Everything they say's got the truth twisted up
But twisted up's what I want man, I can't get enough
Cuz even though we know it's all just a big bluff
We just light another up, what
We don't give a fuck

Listen to the words,
Listen for awhile
Lip Service radio, dont touch the dial
If you're in the car
Turn up the track man
Give the whole neighborhood some second hand rap
Matter of fact
Listen to the words,
Listen for awhile
Lip Service radio, dont touch the dial
If you're in the car
Turn up the track man
Give the whole neighborhood some second hand rap

SIXTYONE. mooncakes! :D

after exam went to longjohnsilvers with my mum for breakfast :D haha. chicken sausage sandwich. DAMN NICE :D hehehe. after that went to johnlittle and i finally bought my shavingcream wahaha =X


went around and bought MOONCAKES!!! lots of it i tell you -__- sooooo MAD :P bought from bengawan solo [damn sweet please. recommended for sugar addicts.], prima deli [their oreo chocolate is sooooo heavenly!! recommended for all. it's ex though.]. fourseasons [DURIAN yeuch LOL. got yam and greentea too. very nice (:] and some chinese stall selling my fave::::: CRISPY-SKINNED YAM WITH PUMPKIN PASTE! woo! hahaha. hey it's like my alltime fave ok. ever since i tasted it, i fell in love with it :D hahaha.

SIXTY. omgs?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

ok, like FINALLY, i just finished e list of achievements which was due SO MANY MONTHS AGO?!?!?!?!?!?!?!


hahaha. i'm bored. and i have tuition later. ARGH!?!?!?!?!!?!?!? tcher coming around 5-5.30 )): 我不要!!!!!!

FIFTYNINE. exammmmm

bio paper was SHIT!!!!!


rahhh. haha think can pass lo ):

FIFTYEIGHT. randommmmm

hahaha. was just thinking about something. it's been so long since i was SINGLE!!! LOL! hey, freedom much kehhhh :D like so much contrast in my life ever since i broke up. LOL! positive way lah :D oh, i must mention something. no relationships during this period ((: OH, and again, must go through my friends first. hahaha. yeah, it's also because i don't trust my judgement anymore =X

FIFTYSEVEN. revision!!!

whew, just finished writing all e notes on BIOLOGY. muahaha. BUT!!! i didn't draw all e diagrams =X LOL. lazy lahhh )): alot of diagrams to complete. hmm. planning to do it after prelims. wahaha. it's preparation for O's :D


currently having phy/chem tuition :D ok, this is soooo last minute. hmm, home tuition again ((: had one lesson on thurs. tcher not bad la. but then, another chinese-speaking one. rahhh, why is it so hard to find english-speaking tutors?!?!?!?!? OH, for e benefit for some people, i need to add that the tutor is a FEMALE :D hahaha. nope, my tutor is NOT one hot guy. LOL!!! preferably not anyway, later distracted. hahaha =X


oh well, gotta go at 3 to continue my revision. hehe, another tuition after bio tmr ): gotta CHIONG homework. yes, i have homework for tuition. oh, for the first time i must add. LOL! yeah... next thurs also sci pract )))): i'm SCARED!!!!

























oh, did i mention that i've started yet another drama? LOL =X 公主小妹 hahaha. yeah yeah, i'm crazy. getting addicted to these dramas right before my o's and during prelims =X LOL!!! but this one not so bad la, not as addicted as 命中注定我爱你 (: must buck up my studies first :D maybe after O's then rewatch 公主小妹 ((: LOL! i'm 乖 ok :D

FIFTYSIX.

suddenly thought of what my dad said to us last night. he said that he can't take violence. you know, i wanted to tell him "cannot take violence? then what do you call those beatings you gave my and jie?" i seriously wanted to throw that into his face last night. but i controlled. he said that he cannot bear to beat people up. cannot bear to beat people up? but you can bear to beat your own flesh and blood? oh how nice huh.

FIFTYFIVE. fuckoff

i seriously hate this family.


don't let me go prom i never come and make noise alrdy. now don't let me go out with my friends? argh. say i don't care right? fine. i'll show all of you what's the meaning of don't care.

FIFTYFOUR. goodbye addiction (:

YAY!!! i finally watched the last epi of 命中注定我爱你! :D hahaha. one less distraction lo :D gonna continue revision after dinner ((:

FIFTYTHREE. thoughts

was just thinking about stuffs, and i thought, hey, my life is something special and unique. though my daily routine is just about the same as anyone else, with hardly anything exciting or special happening, but i thought, even though it's so normal to anybody else, it's still really special to me. you see, not eveyone in this world have gone through the same experiences as me, not everyone has met the same people as me.


in my life, there are so many ups and downs. not everyone has the same problems. all of us each have our own problems to go through, some might be lucky, while others might have even more serious situations to solve. some don't even have the support system to go through their lives. i'm already considered very very lucky.


after that incident, i thought my life was over. all the innocence in me have disappeared. maybe God's watching over me? i don't know. at least i have something that's important and personal to me. at least i still have that. even so, it was so hard to let go of the fact that it nearly happened. even so, i had realised that there are people out there who truly care for me and love me. yes, because of this, i know how much my family cares. because of this, i found true friendship with not one, not two, but FIVE wonderful girls. i actually thought that they will look down on me because of what had happen. i was so very wrong. they're still there by my side, probably closer than ever because of this. i thought there was no love in this world. i thought wrong. for the first time, i experienced true love. though it's not from a guy, i'm not disappointed. how many people in this world have experienced that first hand?


all these made me realise one thing. i'm lucky. i wasted so much time and tears just thinking of what happened. what for? all these don't change anything. time can't be turned back. whatever happened, happened. i can't change the past. why wallow in self pity? why think that i can't go through this? if i don't pick myself up, nobody else can. i already brought so much trouble to so many people. no more. no more worrying, no more crying over this. i'm going to let go. yes, i am. though sometimes i still feel like screaming in frustration, but it's gonna get better. yes, it is. wounds will heal. i must get rid of the footprints you left in my heart. it's goodbye.

FIFTYTWO.

went to kk for appt early ytd morning. so damn lack of sleep lo )): stayed thr till abt... 11+? haha. wanted to go out with xinyan and cindy but then yan said tt cindy can't go out. ROAR!!!! LOL! end up went to novena with mum after e appt. i bought a ring :D it's really pretty la. green butterfly :D i love it!! haha


after tt walked ard to find bday present for wuyi but couldn't find. so went to toa payoh to see my mama. stayed thr for awhile then brought her to see doc with sayi and cousin. went to fetch wuyi and we went to tampines ikea for dinner :D ate POACHED SALMON!!! hahaha. i was so damn bloated -___-


went for car ride. sayi dropped mama and wuyi at toa payoh then fetched us back home. during e car ride i was listening to my music and my mum and sayi were talking to LOUD that i can hear them through my earpiece so clearly. that means something ok. considering that i blast my music through my earpiece everytime [ohhhh, did i mention? i got my mp3 back :D] then my cousin was at e front seat. and CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!!??!?! HE CAN ACTUALLY SLEEP SO UNTIL SO SHUANG THOUGH E WOMEN IN E CAR WERE TALKING SO LOUDLY??!?!?!?!?!?!?!? hahaha. my mum said cause he's "P-I-G" OOPS!!! reached home abt 8+? haha. EXHAUSTED!!!!!! i bathed then went to sleep. tt's about 9?!?!?!?!?!?!??! hahaha.


woke up about 12.30 and couldn't get back to sleep. BLOCKED NOSE!!!! bo bian, got up, splash face with cold water, felt better. BUT!!! i still couldn't go back to sleep. end up watching 命中注定我爱你 LOL! i left one final epi :D hahaha. went back to bed at abt 3? LOL i'm mad. haha =X


woke up abt 10+ this morning. wanted to sleep longer but then, don't know what's wrong la. once wake up cannot go back to sleep. arghhhh.. ):


i'm now taking a brk from studying bio -____- OMG!!!! heyy, study mood today k. hahaha :D studied 3 chaps alrdy hor. mai siao siao k. haha :D gonna go back to bio soon!! :D

FIFTYONE.

HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY!!!

FIFTY.

i wanna scream out loud!





if only i could go to prom ): haha. NVM!!!! i'll have my excitement through my girls :D














i'm not feeling particularly happy today.