ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYEIGHT.

i feel so fucking USED by everybody. my mind is almost made up.

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYSEVEN.

i swear, i'll come to a decision soon about everything.







ahh. bio ppr later D: so DEAD. i wanted an A for this and i think.. it's not gonna come true after all ): forgot about everything and i keep slacking ):

never mind. i'll do my v best (: i mean. hey, it's BIO! it's my second best subb. it's gonna be good. right? (:

SIX MORE FREAKING PAPERS TO GO! :D

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYSIX.

what am i doing online?


roar. the dead pix thing is SPREADING LIKE FUCK! huge slash now can D: will hardly be online from now on. really can't tahan the slash. irritating D:

sighh.. i can't continue like this. it's killing me!!!!!!

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYFIVE.

i'm just so fucking confused. do i dare continue? and risk losing everything else which is precious to me? or should i stop this and lead a different life.











either way, it will HURT.

i'm so sorry people. nothing can explain the hurt and guilt i feel right now. but...

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYFOUR. tagboard spammers. ughh.

lala.

i'm so sick of unknown taggers. seriously, they're just so super immature. insult us owners of blogs. what's their problem man. see something that they don't like here, then there they go. insult insult insult. ha! like it's gonna affect us or what. just simply want to create mindless, unnecessary and immature troubles. please loh. if YOU see something you don't like, just click the "x" found in the little red box at the top right hand of your screen. geez, i can't believe you need someone to teach you THAT.

i don't see the reason why people need to insult others. insecurity? or just pure stupidness? must be both, and alot more. ha! fuck off assholes.

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYTHREE.

was playing games just now and realised something...











i haven't even eaten anything [accept a few chocobaby] ever since i woke up this morning. and you know what? i don't feel the least bit hungry at all. weird huh.





anyway, my monitor's abit destroyed already. LOL! there's one part with dead pixels. it was quite small this morning, just one dot and now it's like a slash. haha. getting bigger eh. i know i should shut down and let my screen rest but... don't want la. hahaha =X that slash is like one opening man. lol like it's gonna get bigger and something's gonna come out of it. LOL ok, thinking too much. hahaha :D

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYTWO.

woo! this blogskin is edited with alot of work and consideration. hahaha. added in blog item titles and edited the spacings and alignments too. changed the words "you're supermassive" into "this is my life" haha. makes more sense you know =X




hardest work i've ever done for my blogskin :D PROUD! hahaha ((:

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTYONE.

great. my blogskin's nice. BUT... the top arrangement abit weird uh. siannn. lazy to edit. next time then :D LOL by that time think i will have a new blogskin? HAHAHA :D

ONEHUNDREDANDTWENTY.

yawn. super bored la D: feel like playing audit. LOL =X

anyway, was surfing web and i discovered one game : Atlantica (: looks nice. so now downloading. oh don't worry. i won't start playing now (:

sigh. blogger's really slow now. so irritating.

i feel like eating jap food LOL yah, again ): want to go ribencun =X completely random i know.

feel like going out, shopping, go town walk, go bugis junction. got a new store there and i wanna check it out. selling dresses :D quite nice. curious curious. haha :D

got a new song. goodbye by miley cyrus. that song is so damn sad and touching i tell you. can totally relate to that song (: haha. current faves :D

ONEHUNDREDANDNINETEEN.

A lot of heartache can change a person,
Drive a wedge through the strongest ties and
Break even the deepest love.

ONEHUNDREDANDEIGHTEEN.

why am i awake so early in the morning on a saturday? ):





feel like going over to esplanade study. LOL! =X ah well. and i need one physics tutor man. i don't want physics to pull down my science D: this sucks.

maybe tmr going over to esplanade :D alone/not alone i don't really mind (: haha. become antisocial. why not? eight more papers only. fast fast one (:

anyway, i not very hyped up about four days break already. LOL! i rather everyday paper. then at least will end super fast. don't need to drag. this is like prelims loh. both also dragg. kns lah ):

ONEHUNDREDANDSEVENTEEN.

lala.

RED ALERT THREEEEE D:

hahaha. i really really want that ALOT ):

ONEHUNDREDANDSIXTEEN.

ooo. i just remembered something LOL!

ytd morning, was chatting with hanwei on msn, then he said something about buddy love. and i just told him ::


I BUDDY LOVE YOU! LOL!

sounds very funny. haha!!!!! paiseh la. super ccrap, but. this is a way to relieve GEOG stress. LOL! ((((:

ONEHUNDREDANDFIFTEEN.

ohgawddd.

emathp1 and amathp2 TOTAL DISASTER!

see la. how like that?

arghhh. anyway, gonna RELAX for awhile. maybe until saturday :D FOUR DAYS BREAK BEFORE MY NEXT PAPER! v^_^v hahaha.








randomisationssssss :D

ONEHUNDREDANDFOURTEEN.

lalala.

last night heard on radio that for eng o's, if you didn't leave 3 line spacing in between your answers, they will MINUS MARKS?! wtf.. that strict?

ONEHUNDREDANDTHIRTEEN. if i were a boy...

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear Id be a better man.
Id listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause hes taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

ONEHUNDREDANDTWELVE.

lala.

amathp1 today. was quite easy la. alot easier than school's paper :D haha. i'm happy. hope amathp2 will not be so hard lo (:

tmr's geog. rahh. must chiong already (:

ONEHUNDREDANDELEVEN.

lala. was looking through np's courses, and found some which really attracted me :D haha. btw, i'm only gonna give up on amath. the rest i'll do my best :D

a. masscomm
b. child psychology and early education [ it's a new course (: ]
c. tourism and resort management
d. biomed science
e. biomed lab tech

haha. though the first two courses is more to my liking (: haha. i'm still wishing for the diploma in applied drama and psychology in sp though ):

ONEHUNDREDANDTEN.

never thought i'd say this but.. o's english was hard...

ONEHUNDREDANDNINE. love bug

Now I'm speechless, over the edge
I'm just breathless, I never thought
That I'd catch this love bug again
Hopeless, head over heels in the
Moment, I never thought that I'd
Get hit by this love bug again

ONEHUNDREDANDEIGHT.

WOOOO! chem was easy :D hahaha. now must kao phy already. i'll be damn sadded if phy pulls my marks down ):

ONEHUNDREDANDSEVEN.

lalala. cold weather D:

ordered MAC for lunch :D haha. k la. i'm so putting on weight D: complained to my sis about this and she said that i'm ACTING that i'm on diet. she said that outside with my friends i won't eat then at home i gorge myself. OH PLEASE. i eat more than my friends now can. LOL =X oh wait. BY THE WAY, I DON'T GORGE MYSELF PLEASE. THAT'S DISGUSTING LOL =X

went to popular with sis to buy pencil case and post its :D got the purple one. very nice :D after that chiong-ed to ntuc buy ginger. left my sis there and rushed to sasa. [ btw, i'm rushing cause my jie CLAIMS she's late for her meeting with friends at cine -__- ] look for eyebrow tweezers. saw 2. but decided to go john little to find. rushed there [ damn. john little SUPER PACKED ], look around halfheartedly cause it's really squeezy, couldn't find any so chiong-ed back to sasa to get the tweezers there. met up with sis again and we walked to the interchange tgt.

was raining super heavily la omg. then the construction part was sooo FLOODED -__- slippers got soaked D: split up with jie at the station and bus-ed home. waited at my busstop for FIFTEEN WHOLE MINUTES for my mum to come down to fetch me up with umbrella. she keep complaining that it's raining very heavily. keep asking me to wait -__-

came home, changed. decided to photocopy my entry proof. photocopy machine run out of ink -_- suay. changed ink, mum was there beside me also. was telling her that i like this printer cause the ink doesn't leak when... i opened one of the inks and "SPLAT!" blue ink practically SPLASHED at my hand -__- i have blue fingers now. can't wash off. zzz. kns can. LOL my mum was saying "see la. say too early already." -____- sibei diao.

after that laminated my entry proof. the laminating machine is soooo !%#$%!~%$%^!~! i tell you. the instructions clearly stated "please allow the machine to warm up for 5-10 minutes, after which a green-light indicator will appear." i waited patiently. 5 minutes passed...no light. 10 minutes passed...no light. i decided to give it another few minutes, thinking that first time usage need longer time. 15 minutes passed...no light. TWENTY MINUTES PASSED...STILL NO FREAKING LIGHT -___- i was so damn pekcek already, i just went ahead and laminated my entry proof. it came out JUST FINE. that stupid light [ or rather, the lack of it ] SCAM ME!!! wtf.

anyway, now my entry proof is nicely done and won't be so easily folded anymore! hahaha. no more crumpled entry proof :D

hmm. i owe somebody movie after my O's ((: YES, IT'LL BE WILLINGLY CAUSE ACCORDING TO HIM, I OWE HIM ALOT OF THEM D:

tmr O's starting. so what am i doing here in front of the frking computer? i don't know -__-

studied chem in the morning (: manage to get some things in my head. reactivity series, mole concepts and stoichiometry [omg? ], cation table tests for gases and salt solubility. ROCKS K. haha. later tonight will chiong anion and ORGANIC CHEM!!! i hate o chem. seriously. io chem is so much nicer. isn't that funny coming out from me? haha. io got more calculations and i prefer it. WEIRD.

why am i so random today...??

ONEHUNDREDANDSIX. young and in love

Let them pull at the seams

Don't they know what it means

To be young and in love like that

Who are they to decide

If it's wrong, if it's right

To be young and in love like that

ONEHUNDREDANDFIVE.

ARGH. I'M SO SICK OF PPL MSGING ME SO EARLY IN THE MORNINGS AND WAKING ME UP!!!! PEOPLE, I'M A SUPER LIGHT SLEEPER SO MY PHONE VIBRATION CAN EASILY WAKE ME UP. IF YOU THINK I'M STILL SLEEPING, THEN FOR FUCK'S SAKE DON'T MESSAGE ME LAH. KNN.



super pissed off. having bad headache and though i slept early last night, i'm still super exhausted. 7+am come and msg me. kns. want to go back to sleep also cannot. ARGHHHHHH D:





wenzi: thanks! :D
cindy: haha. i know la. next time must really PULL you to taman jurong already. LOL :D KIDNAP YOU!! hahaha
xinyan: yeah i know :D thanks alot anyway (((:

ONEHUNDREDANDFOUR. thoughts

ok, i'm posting alot today.

thinking about stuffs and not doing my revision. ultimate crime. sigh. somebody's gonna scold me if he reads this =X

you know, see couples on the street, have friends with gf/bf, seeing them so happy, abit jealous lei =X. i know not every relationship is perfect. every relationship will have ups and downs. that i know. but then, i always wonder to myself. why is it that all my relationships all went down and no ups? is it the guys? or is it just me? whenever i thought that it's going up, up and up, it all just come crashing down. and i realised that i'm just hiding the truth from myself. i didn't want to face up to reality you see.

when i look back now, i realised. it has been always me. yes, i'm selfish and self-centered when it comes to relationships. yes, i'm really admitting that. i almost never spare a thought for my bfs. there. i said it. and i'm sorry.

well, i've got a resolution. i'm gonna complete my O's first, then i'll change by the time 2008 ends. i'll spare a thought for others. but, i won't let anybody take advantage of me. no more of that. i need to learn how to give and take regarding friendships too. yes, sometimes i feel so taken advantage of when it comes to my girlfriends. i don't know why. is it the fact that i give in to you guys most of the time? the feeling is so not good. yes, you've been there when i needed you. i thank you for that. but, i guess i'll just stop being so naive all the time.

sorry, this girl is gonna undergo some serious attitude changes after O's. hope everything will be better then.

ONEHUNDREDANDTHREE.

yawns. just finished a few chem papers. impossible? of course it is lah. i copied the ans. LOL! =X ah well, gonna look through them later (:

not going to pm already. i'm LAZY. hahaha. but i need to shopping for stationery :D postits! hahaha. not really urgent, but i'll die if i stay home the whole day -__- mum and dad going to chinatown and i get to stay home :D hahaha. contradicting. ok, REPHRASE. i want to go out, but i don't want to go out with mum and dad =X

lala. i'm really bored now. i keep thinking of TOWN. LOL! and i've been craving for jap food since YESTERDAY?!?!?!?!!? D: ribencun D: haha i'm crazy. i'm broke yet i wanna go there to eat ): lala. i need CASH!

gonna go back to chemmy now. BYE!

ONEHUNDREDANDTWO. can i have this dance?

Take my hand, take a breath
Pull me close and take one step
Keep your eyes locked on mine,
And let the music be your guide.

Won't you promise me (now won't you promise me, that you'll never forget)
We'll keep dancing (to keep dancing) wherever we go next

It's like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you
It's one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Take my hand, I'll take the lead
And every turn will be safe with me
Don't be afraid, afraid to fall
You know I'll catch you threw it all

And you can't keep us apart (even a thousand miles, can't keep us apart
Cause my heart is (cause my heart is) wherever you are

It's like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you
It's one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Oh no mountains too high enough, oceans too wide
Cause together or not, our dance won't stop
Let it rain, let it pour
What we have is worth fighting for
You know I believe, that we were meant to be

ONEHUNDREDANDONE.

lalala.

i'm sooo bored D: and i'm wondering, who's "hyss student hub"? o.O

haha. maybe later going pm if mum lets. or maybe she wants me go chinatown with her and dad. shrugs. don't feel like following them =X haha. wanna study! TWO MORE FREAKING DAYS AND I'M DOING ANYTHING! shit. chem is like so... i ttly forgot EVERYTHING?!?!?!??!??!! D: tried to do mcq ytd and i couldn't even remember a single shit. kns =X

argh. what happened to that study drive i had last time?!?!???!?!! i need somebody there to cheer me on D:

chatted with cindy just now. she was wondering why it's called mofo. so i said "then call it what? mofu? that's like TOFU." haha. mofu :P sounds so funny. maybe should use that instead of mofo right? then if you scold someone and that person doesn't know what it means, you can just explain to him/her that it's a kind of TOFU. haha. ok, lame and random =X

ah well, if only i can thon outside and study. IF ONLY. cindy said i should do that at pm. which means i have to wait for the very first bus to be in service then i can go home. that's like 5.30AM? maddening. i can't. i'm a pig. i need sleep D: haha. but, if only la. it'll be fun. hahaha :D think if i can and i did that, you'll see me snoring away in mac already. LOL =X abit kuazhang [ since i don't really snore. ] but, you get what i mean la. and i can't be tired. once i'm tired, i'm CRANKY! LOL.

damn. i know i need to go back to studies now but!!. haha. well, you know, same old, same old. sigh. i need to get out of this house. change of environment is always good for me :D hahaha! and and, esplanade's cafe seem like a really good place to study :D it's really quiet. haha. damnnnnn D:

i really need the drive right now. AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! D:





mfccbknnnb

ONEHUNDRED.

gonna find one day to stay out really late to study =X

current loves!!! CARTEL! they're like the best ever rock band. I LOVE CARTEL! LOL




haha. well, the pic can't be big -__- but!!! the vocalist [ that's the one in the pink shirt ], will pugh is sooooooooo handsome can. =X

NINETYNINE.

MY NATIVE AMERICAN ZODIAC SIGN IS SALMON!! LOL!

go to http://www.paulsadowski.com/BirthData.asp for more details on your bday. LOL!

and also, http://www.paulsadowski.com/NameData.asp for the meaning of your name :D


this is FUN!!!! :D

NINETYEIGHT.

LOL suddenly thought of something and went to check the meaning behind my name. ok, there's no Mabelline, but there's Mabel, and it means..










are you ready for this?











it means LOVEABLE LOL
and and , i saw this webpage which shows you the meaning behind your name, and i got this::

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.

You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.

You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic “Type A” personality.

You are full of energy. You are spirited and boisterous.

You are bold and daring. You are willing to do some pretty outrageous things.

Your high energy sometimes gets you in trouble. You can have a pretty bad temper at times.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time.

Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.



LOL! IT'S VERY TRUE FOR MOST OF THEM!!!! hahaha =X

NINETYSEVEN.

been feeling sudden knife-like pains around my body. and my hip's SPOILT.. AGAIN! damn it. worse than ever. now walk SLOWLY also got pain. but NO, i'm not going back to therapy.

oh, i realised something.. i have cravings to cook when i'm depressed. well, i feel like cooking now :O

NINETYSIX.

i wanna watch MAX PAYNE! somebody bring me go watch please. LOL =X










ugh.. i don't wanna study alone anymore. who's going out to study, please please call me out D:

NINETYFIVE.

prac exam was like !#$%^$# i tell you, no amount of studying will help this exam D:










no more. please, no more.

NINETYFOUR.

having some indigestion nowadays. damn it D:

NINETYTHREE. pictures!

lalala. was feeling so bored, so cam-whored. LOL! this is soooo NOT ME =X

anyway, i was looking at my bday bash's photos, i realise something... I AM SOOOO GODDAMN CHUBBY!!!!!! i mean like FAT chubby and not CUTE chubby. SHIT! i actually have CHUBS ON MY FACE!!!!!! D: someone please please an wei me and say that i'm look ok D: though i don't think it'll work?!?!?!? T.T



evidence of acting cute #1


evidence of acting cute #2 LOL!


haha. i actually like this picture ALOT :D idk why. haha (:


emo-ing. oops! =X

ok, a few days back my mum was making sandwiches (: and she made SARDINE SANDWICHES. haha. i haven't really acquired the taste yet, so i can't say that's it's uber nice or what (: ANYWAY, i took one pic of the mashed sardine. it looks like... ok, but looks can be deceiving =X




then that day i also helped to cook dinner ((: prepared the dishes only actually, then mum did the cooking =X she cooked veggie stew. VERY NICE. that's my ultimate favourite dinner dish. haha :D



still boiling on the stove. yummm! the whole kitchen's filled with the AROMA of this dish :D



oh, we made meatballs too! :D ok, it's frozen from ikea. haha. yummm! i love this.

NINETYTWO.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO XIN YAN! :D
lots of love, hugs and kisses. you'll always be my darling (((: haha.

NINETYONE. pictures!

lalala. here are the pics from e SCB gathering cum bday party for me. haha :D











we had steamboat for lunch!


yepp! that's my birthday cake ((:








haha. five girls blowing kisses to me :D


omg. five girls trying to punch me D:


LOL! retribution to xinyan only?!?!?! =X


AWWWWW.. haha


no, i'm not trying to strangle her though it looks like it -__-


wee. sarah and me :D




awww, big hug :D


awwww. another big hug :D


hahaha! i feel loved :D LOL

NINETY.

ok WHAT THE FUCK. i just received a message saying "hey! my fren sae tat u r veri preety. can i be ur fren?" ok, at first, i thought some sicko messaged me and i thought, WHO THE FUCK IS THAT FRIEND MAN!!

guess who messaged me?




















it's FADHIL.




this is so anti-climax.


this is SO funny.

EIGHTYNINE.

071008
after school went to jurong green with brina, jasmine and alfie. haha. was raining very heavily. we bus-ed there and brina sent us across one by one using one very small umbrella. we got drenched anyway -__- haha. bought our meals and went to the cc's staircase to eat. like zi bi can =X

after eating said bye to e three of them and went to mac to meet hanwei and fadhil. listened to hanwei explain dnt stuffs to fadhil for awhile, then took out math to do. okay, what's surprising is that i could actually study? haha. finished about one and a half paper :D i'm proud alright. hehe =X

fadhil went off about 6 and i stayed for awhile more. watched hanwei play NBA on his psp then we went off about 6++, close to 7. walked with hanwei to the hdb void deck. he's leading me the wrong way ok?!?!? LOL

reached home about 7++ D: tired. BUT! at least i studied :D

081008
SICK AGAIN!!! high fever =X must be the rain the previous day D: this sucks!

finished up my chem notes :D FINALLY. haha :D did my cresent girls' compre. FINALLY! =X had abit of study mood lah. luckily (:

091008
need to do THREE FRIGGING SOCIAL STUDIES PAPER AND IT'S TO BE HANDED IN TO MS LUI ON MONDAY!! D: yes, i'm going back to school on monday. how sad is that!?!??!?! 9-11am chemistry. figured i'll just go and listen to mr lee explain the practical stuffs (:

after school stayed back awhile to wait for cindy. mrs pan was going through her prelim paper 1 (: then bus-ed down to polyclinic with her to see doctor for her [very gross and disgustingly, superbly swollen] ear. LOL =X DOC SAID NEED SURGERY IF THE CREAM HE GAVE HER DOESN'T WORK! LOL. aiya, hope the cream works :D

after that bus-ed down to jurong green to eat. been so long since i ate MCSPICY! haha =X damn. need to control my weight. i'm gonna maintain my fluctuating 48-49kgs :D wanted to stay with hanwei and gang to study, but in the end didn't D:

bus-ed to boon lay and bus-ed home. shit, i just remembered. i forgot to buy my bus consession -___-

i don't wanna school tomorrow D:

EIGHTYEIGHT. confession

sometimes, i just want to slash my arm. and sometimes, i do it. because sometimes, i just need a way to release all the frustrations inside.

i'm sorry. don't blame me. i needed a way out...









give me a cigarette right now and i'll gladly smoke it.

EIGHTYSEVEN.

weee! didn't go school today. i'm SICK ok!!! not because i purposely pon-ed school today. ok, i might have that thought last night, but i woke up with a slight fever [37.8] and this killer headache -____- like kns right??!?!?! haha. i didn't want to be really sick at all alright D:

went out to jurong point to meet cindy to get my stuffs, then lunch-ed at mos burger with mum. oh wait, i'm sick and yet i'm eating mos? heck, i don't give a damn.

came back home to put down my things and walked to e clinic. 37.3 is called slight fever? LOL! idk?!?!?!?!? that's what e doc say :D hahaha! when collecting my medi, e receptionist there was lecturing me on bgr -__- uhmmm.. i think i know the reason why, but no way i'm gonna type it out in this PUBLIC blog of mine. hehehe =X

went to ntuc to buy food for dinner. i bought sweets. LOL! i keep having to remind myself that i'm sick -__- omg. even my mum doesn't even care. LOL! :D:D:D

ah, i got my shirt :D yay! haha. but when i tried it, it doesn't really fit? e shoulder part is too wide. or maybe it's too puffy. idk =X hahaha! maybe gonna dump it to my sis if it suits her =X! or maybe my MUM can wear? LOL! ok, that's abit too... =X

going back to school tmr!!! haha. if only... OH NEVER MIND =X









oh oh, ZAC EFRON IS HOT!! LOL!

EIGHTYSIX.

what does it take to forget?
what does it take to lose a memory?
what does it take to smother a cry?
what does it take to kill?












i'm going crazy

EIGHTYFIVE.

i don't know how long i can take this. ohmygod. just take me away please.

EIGHTYFOUR.

have you ever felt as if you want to tell the truth but you didn't in the end because you were afraid of how the other party would react?










well, i did.

EIGHTYTHREE. pictures :D

was bored ytd while doing my chem so camwhored a lil =X


i'm proud of my pens!! LOL!






say hello to my camera! haha


ok, i look fat =X omg D:

EIGHTYTWO. shittt D:

i'm sick dammit D:

after school pei-ed cindy to her house then went with her to coffee bean to buy cake for her teacher's bday (: came home, ate, watched tv, suddenly felt damn sick and tired so went to bed. coughing non-stop ): now having very very bad headache and i think fever's coming ))): dammit

EIGHTYONE. potatoes!

made potato salad for lunch :D haha. used purple potatoes. they're much nicer than the normal brown potatoes :D ALOT nicer ((: here's some pics! :D



after peeling the skin. oh, don't be fooled by it's ugly appearance...


...just look how nice the inside is!


cut into cubes and dumped into a bowl :D


the end-product! don't look so appetising? wait till you taste it :D

purple potatoes, kraft's mayo, black pepper and parsley flakes added in ((: oh, with some drops of lemon juice too! these are the ingredients to a yummy and healthy lunch :D hahaha!

EIGHTY.

a bottle of pills.
a kinfe through your heart.
a noose round your neck.
a bullet through your temple.
a plastic bag knotted around your head.
a gas stove switched on in an enclosed room.
a jump from the tallest building.
a car accident.

these are the things which can kill you. but in my opinion, it's too fast a death.

i feel as if i'm dying from the inside out. do you have any idea how much that hurts?

SEVENTYNINE.

i hate you for doing this to me..
i cry, not because of you.
i cry because of what had happened.
i want to kill myself because it hurts.
i want to run till i faint.
i want to drink till i pass out.
i want to smoke till my lungs die.
i scratch myself because it's how i run away from my problems.
yes, it's how i run away.






if only i could just disappear.

SEVENTYEIGHT. apologies ):

ok, i admit i haven't very fair to somebody. yeah, i let my feelings take over and stuffs. and i want to apologise for whatever i said about you. i'm sorry.