twohundredandthirtytwo.

imagine that you'd have to see your loved one in an accident. watch the front bumper of a car knock her down. stare at her every move as she falls. hear her ear-piercing screams. observe as she lay motionless on the road. imagine the shock that you'd feel as you watch, stunned. then you start running towards her. you fall and cradle her in your arms. you scrutinize her face. her whole body is covered in blood. foam is coming out of her mouth. you scream and shout her name. she gives no response, lying still in your arms. you beg, you cry, you wail for the agony to stop. you are oblivious to the sirens. the paramedics arrive but you take no heed. they pull you away, but you continue screaming. the paramedics pronounced her dead. you become hysterical. you become crazy. you could no longer think about anything else except for the fact that SHE IS DEAD. you are sedated. the last thing you see is her bloodied and battered body being covered up. you attempt one last scream but you couldn't hear anything.

the next thing you know, you wake up strapped to a bed. you cannot move. you scream but realise your mouth is covered with a piece of cloth. you struggle and end up getting cut by the straps. you relax. you close your eyes. and replay the whole accident in your head. you cry. you do not want to live anymore. what's the point? you ask yourself. you start sobbing. you start blaming yourself. "if only i had walked her home." "if only i had not made her angry." "if only..." "if only..." the doctor came in. he talks to you but you do not listen to anything. he starts taking off the straps and untie the cloth at your mouth. he does some check-ups. he leaves. you stare into space. thinking, thinking. you see a cup of water by your bedside. you gulp it down. you smash the glass. you close your eyes. you hold it to your throat. you are about to slash it against your throat when you hear a whisper. "don't do it. be strong." it sounds familiar. you open your eyes. you see HER. she is crying. "don't do it." she says again. she comes to hold her hand. you smile. and you know eveything is alright. you know that even though she is dead, she will always be there by your side. you smile wider. "i love you." you whisper. "goodbye." and you let go.

sometimes even if you love someone deeply, the only way for both of you to be happy is to let go. do not suffocate them with your love. soon it will turn into hatred and both of you will be miserable.